Monday, May 19, 2014

Dear World, Thank You for the Respite

A lot has happened lately, and I haven't had the energy to blog about it. The days are long, and each is different and each is so similar. Palliative Care is a strange kind of in-between. A drawn out waiting room. There is some beautiful about it. I continue to hate it, on many levels, and on so many others I have grown used to it.

I see a lot of people who I don't normally see, and the thought crosses my mind: "These are the people I will see at her funeral". It's a strange sort of thought. In some ways a terribly dark thought, in some ways a very comforting thought. Her goddaughter is someone I have known from school, though she was not in my grade, and I have been able to talk to her and it has been a great comfort for me.

Auntie was discharged from hospital and is now under palliative care for another hospital, but as an outpatient which is great news.

We do some things that I'm sure psychologists would say are not healthy. Spend a lot of money on her. I don't care. Nobody can tell me otherwise. What I did learn thought was it's okay to have 24 hours away, and recently I had a 24 hour break to Sydney - about an hour plane ride away.

I saw my cousin who lives down there. We ate food. We drank. We went and saw Lion King at the the theatre. My friends and I sat at Starbucks and drank and read our books for a couple of hours.Forget the rest of the world. Pure Bliss.

It was a kind break the world gave me away from the explosion of stress the world has given me - good stress and bad stress. In the past week, I am now employed in three different places. I am so thrilled. Every single one of these employments are in the disability field - one of them is specifically in speech and communication, and is with Charmaine. These are all excellent things. I can't wait until I can tell you about them properly.

Uni continues to throw never-ending study at me, and in amongst all of that we've had my Auntie's final birthday, the final Mother's Day (both of which I will talk about next post) and never-ending issues with Grandfather...

And so, the world exploded with stress. Blogging became a distant dream.

But I was given 24 hours. 24 hours to breathe.

24 hours without guilt. 24 hours with sunshine. 24 hours with friends (who I am frequently neglecting).

Thank you for the respite world. Now I can return to it all. Discussions of how many milligrams of what medication Auntie has taken or should take are back. Cleaning the house is back. The days that are so similar, yet so different are back.

But I got a break, and it was fantastic.

Give yourself a break sometime soon, too.

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